Happy Birthday Daniel

It was a wonderful day with the Beckering Tribe. The weather was absolutely gorgeous. We started our morning off at Emmie's soccer game. Then it was on to playing outside and stroller walks. In the afternoon, my parent's, my sister, DJ and his girlfriend Emily, James and his girlfriend Jen and Tyler ( a family friend's son) came for cake and ice cream. Daniel really had no interest in opening presents, but Sophia was very happy to help him! ;) The "guys" decided that the day was too good to pass up putting in the dock and shore stations.....so they have been working outside all afternoon. All the "girls" big and small and Daniel played on the other side of the house. Swinging, doing side walk chalk, watching Sophia pedal on her tricycle and just having fun talking with each other and enjoying the day. As you can see, Daniel loves my sister, Ingrid. We had chocolate cake and ice cream cake. Sophia kept saying "yummy cake...big bite please" and Daniel really didn't care for it too much. And Mommy isn't one that pushes for that picture of smearing the cake all over. No surprise there, right? So all in all, it was a wonderful day.....a day that I feel so thankful for.......Happy Birthday Daniel, my miracle child.....I love you so much.

Big Day

Happy Birthday, Daniel.......

Good morning birthday boy......we are going to have a great day!

I love you so much!

First of many....

Well, Daniel got his first fat lip this morning......tears, blood....the works. I'm not quite sure what happened. We were all in the kitchen and WHAAAAAA......I look down and he is sobbing. You know that cry......the one where you say......."Ok....breathe".......I think Sophia whacked him in the mouth but not on purpose since there was laughter from both before the incident. I asked her what happened and she said "Deedal sad". There is no doubt in my mind this child is going to have plenty of falls and boo-boo's! But he always gets lot's of hugs and kisses from Mommy! ;)

My little guy......

First off, I want to thank all of you for your gracious comments on my previous post. I want you to know that I think all of your families and the families that are yet to come together and be united are beautiful and a wonderful story as well.

When I found out that I was going to have a boy, I knew it was going to be trouble! lol Daniel has been my high maintenance child since day one. First off, he was a spitter. He would puke up so much of his bottle I would hold him over the sink. This started the first week I was home with him. Scared me to death. He hated sleeping on his back or being swaddled. At 13 days old I put him on his stomach. Life got a little better. At 7 weeks I started adding cereal to his bottle to try and keep him from puking so much. It helped, so at 8 months cereal went into EVERY bottle. Whew....got that one under control.

The child poops his pants like something I'd envision you'd see in a parent's worse nightmare kind of movie. I had one day, where I literally stood at his changing table for 10 minutes and went through 6 diapers. I would no sooner wipe, get the next diaper on and he would poop again. I stood there in total shock......it was like a play dough pump! He's better, but I still call him my pooping maniac!

It is going to take FOREVER to transition to table food. If you put anything unfamiliar in his mouth, we go through this whole gagging ordeal. He is definitely, "The Boss!"

I think that he and Emmie look quite a bit alike. They both have beautiful blue eyes and those lips.......big lips! lol Emmie had brown hair like Daniel until her first summer outside. From then on it was blonde. I'm curious to see if Daniel's will do the same.

The boy can make me break out into a sweat just trying to dress him. He is every where on the changing table. He kicks his legs up, tries to bite his toes, roll over...you name it. I tried all sorts of diversions........he just doesn't care. He puts EVERYTHING into his mouth which makes my constant checking the floor drive me crazy! I've decided all these things must be because he is a boy! Neither of the girls ever did these kind of things! lol When he gets upset, all I have to do is sing You Are My Sunshine and he calms right down. I must have sung that song quite a bit in my sleep deprived state last summer. Daniel also lets me know when meal time is over....he clamps his mouth shut and it is very obvious he wants nothing more.

Books......OMW he LOVES books. In fact, I love them too because they are currently giving me an extra 30 minutes or so after he wakes up from his nap. I have 3-4 books at the end of his bed. He looks at them over and over, talks, giggles and is happy as a clam. So am I! ;) He has been on my hip from day one. A total and complete little Mommy's boy. He gives me the biggest smiles I have ever seen. He's been grabbing my face with one hand for months and turns it towards him if I am not looking at him and he wants my attention. He gives me open mouth kisses and has been squeezing me with his entire body for months to give me a great big hug. He doesn't like to go to anyone but me. The only exception is my sister Ingrid. He'll go to Emmie, but I have to walk away and he just started to go to Daddy during our trip to Maui. Daniel also became very attached to Sophia on our trip as well. He loves her the most after me I think. He's very sensitive. He snuggles me, sucks his thumb and pointer, and lays his little head down on my shoulder whenever he can. He loves to be outside...thank goodness. Last summer he hated the stroller and the car. I felt like I was on lock down. He finally started to like stroller rides at 4 1/2 months. The one thing he has done for me.....he's a great sleeper. He takes great naps now that we are down to one and he sleep's through the night great. I believe that God gave him to us because of this long wait to adopt again. Even though at one point I didn't know if we'd go back, God did. Daniel is Sophia's little pal and they are playing together more and more everyday. He's my miracle child, my stress, my smiles, my exhaustion and I love him to pieces. Thank goodness we made it through this first year! lol Big sigh..........

And I stand corrected once again during my life long journey. I thought my dream of going back to China again was gone.......I prayed that David would still be open to the idea even though our lives seemed so full. I'm married to a man that has a very big heart......and so the journey continues.....

My Story

When Emmie was 2 years old, we were told that the chance of having a baby again was at about a 1 - 3% chance. She was a 30% chance. I was so devastated. I was told that we could be "helped along" if we wanted another baby that badly. I chose not to put myself and my family on that roller coaster. Plus, God had given me a daughter, she was healthy and beautiful. I believed he had heard my prayers. I had three wonderful step children I was raising as well, so my life was full. I needed to be thankful with my life and move on. In 2004, David brought up the idea of adopting after he had been on a mission trip to Guatemala, and spending some time in an orphanage. Emmie was on board immediately.....I wasn't so sure. Did I want to start over, could I love another child as much as Emmie and so on. It didn't take long and I knew it was what I was called to do. I read daily on my yahoo board, found The Story Of You website and counted down the months as the referrals were pouring in on a monthly basis. Only 5 1/2 months after our LID, I got the call. I saw Sophia's picture for the first time and wept with joy that God had found this little angel for our family. The day they placed Sophia in my arms I could not believe the emotions running through me. The love I felt for her was no different then my love for Emmie or my step children. I have never been through anything else in my life that has hit me as hard as adopting Sophia. I came home from China knowing that I would go back for another. That summer, we were in an euphoric state of mind in our home. Sophia had adjusted well, and I was the happiest I had been in years. Four months after we come home with Sophia.................. August 29, 2005 I took a pregnancy test to just make sure I "wasn't" pregnant because after all, it had been 10 years and there was just "no way!" I read through the instructions since it had been a decade and saw that it might take 3 - 5 minutes for your result. BAM.....the double line was there. I looked....... looked again.....re-read the results directions again just to make sure I understood them because it had to be wrong. But, I was indeed pregnant. I started bawling. I cried all day and took another test later that evening because it had to be wrong. I didn't want to be pregnant. Not now.......not after what I saw and experienced in China. Being pregnant would be selfish, I felt so guilty.........I had to go back to bring another baby home....I could feel it in my soul.......and now that dream was gone. I knew deep down in my heart what a miracle it was to be pregnant.........I was in a state of shock for 2 days and didn't tell David. He said he already knew......he knew before the test. He said I was glowing and he had only seen that look on me one other time in his life. It was in January of 1994. After getting over the shock of it all, I began to accept the gift I had been given. God was blessing me with another child of my own. I was still in awe........I scheduled all my doctor appointments and things were going pretty good other than this time I felt sick and tired. In November, I got the dreaded call every pregnant mother fears. One of my tests came back with results that indicated my baby, my son, might have Down Syndrome. I was devastated. They hauled us in for further testing and said the only way to be sure was to have an Amniocentesis Test. There was a small risk of miscarriage and what were we suppose to do if the test came back that he did have DS? Terminate the pregnancy? Absolutely not. That is not our belief.....and I knew that whatever God was planning, I had to except it and have faith. We declined the test and we told no one except my Mother and two very close girlfriends who I knew would pray for me and that I could lean on. I placed several 911 calls to God, pleading to let the test be wrong.......and not for me....for my children. I pleaded with God, literally on my hands and knees.......pleading for a healthy sibling for Emmie. She had prayed for a brother or sister so much of her little childhood life.....please Lord......look how much she has embraced Sophia.....she loves her with all her heart....please don't test her with this....please. And Lord.....you blessed us with Sophia..........she is a gift from you.....please dear God, don't let her have to deal with this on top of all the other emotions and questions she will have of her own someday...........please Lord...........I am begging you for the sake of my children. I know that whatever Daniel's condition is within my womb, you can change it, you can heal him, please Lord, hear my cry. I am putting my faith in you. The morning my c-section was scheduled I trembled like no other time in my life as I was being numbed for the procedure. As soon as I heard him cry, I remember frantically saying "let me see him, let me see him" because I thought if he did indeed have DS I would be able to tell by looking at him. I asked the nurses, I asked the doctor, I ask another doctor.......my baby boy, was perfect....he was healthy, he was fine. I believed God heard my prayers.....and after all my children left that evening and each taking a turn holding their new little brother, I cried again. Only this time they were tears of joy and thankfulness to God.....for I will never know if indeed God performed a miracle within me, but I look forward to the day when I can kneel at his feet and thank him for all he has given me.